


Well, this took a dark turn

by InfamousPlayer



Category: Pocket Monsters | Pokemon (Anime)
Genre: Alder is awesome, Ash & Cynthia Friendship, Ash didn't get reset in Unova AU, Ash has trauma, But also kind of an idiot, Dawn is annoyed, Gen, Like lots of it, Probably OOC but whatever, Suicidal Thoughts, Trip is an asshole, they really love each other but don't know how to say it okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:53:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,803
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27254494
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/InfamousPlayer/pseuds/InfamousPlayer
Summary: Ash, Cynthia, Dawn, Iris and Cilan make fun of Trip and Alder, before things take a dark turn.
Relationships: Satoshi | Ash Ketchum & Everyone, Satoshi | Ash Ketchum & Satoshi no Pikachu | Ash Ketchum's Pikachu, Satoshi | Ash Ketchum & Shirona | Cynthia
Comments: 11
Kudos: 89





	Well, this took a dark turn

**Author's Note:**

  * For [sugarblossom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarblossom/gifts), [Sapphiria](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sapphiria/gifts), [AllisonIlluminated](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllisonIlluminated/gifts), [mythical_song_wolf](https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythical_song_wolf/gifts), [SouthyJr](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SouthyJr/gifts), [KidWestHope16](https://archiveofourown.org/users/KidWestHope16/gifts), [OasisLake76](https://archiveofourown.org/users/OasisLake76/gifts), [kimirce](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kimirce/gifts).



"Oh boy." Ash groaned along with Pikachu, Cilan and Iris as Trip showed up, answering Cynthia's questioning glance with a cringe. "Don't judge me about this, I'm about to go _deep."_ Turning around before she could answer, Ash put on his dumbest face possible.

 _"Hey Trip!_ How's it hanging?!" Ash practically yelled, gathering strange looks from the people around them and causing Iris and Cilan to groan while Trip just looked pissed. Cynthia blinked. "Well, that was a quick change." She had to hold back a laugh, not understanding why Ash was doing this, but knowing he probably had a good reason.

_Eh... probably. Whatever it was it would probably be hilarious._

Meanwhile, Alder just sulked at being completely ignored by everyone besides Trip. "Jeez, yeah, it's not like I'm here or anything." He grumbled, causing Cynthia to glance at him.

"Alder?"

"Yeah?"

"Shut up."

Smartly, Alder did exactly that.

"Ugh... you're as annoying as ever I see. Whatever, I'm not here for you. Alder, get ready, when I win this tournament, you're gonna be the next." The sandy haired boy said with the most serious tone ever, and Cynthia had to hold back an eye roll, seeing that Ash and Cilan and Iris and Dawn clearly didn't even bother to do so.

_Wow. Classic arrogant stereotype. Probably won't last a second against the first Elite Four he faces, NOR against Ash for that matter, but even I know I'm biased towards that opinion. Even then, best to just observe. Maybe there's a good trainer under all that._

Unfortunately, there were more of those around than she would like to admit.

Alder just laughed.

"Ah, I see you're as determined as ever young Trippo! I'll be waiting for you!" Multiple facepalms were heard, this time Cynthia not even bothering to contain herself.

A thick mark visible over his head, Trip scowled at the Champion. "Of course I'm determined. That determination is what's going to beat you." Turning around, missing Cynthia's hidden snort and Alder's good natured grin, he turned back to Ash and _his_ good natured grin.

Ugh. He was surrounded by idiots.

"See you around, brat." Throwing an insult just for the hell of it, Trip scowled even harder when Ash's grin became even bigger and dumber, lifting two thumbs up for him, Pikachu mimicking his trainer. 

Cynthia had to hold her tongue to not call Trip out, not knowing when Ash started affecting her so much to make her lose her usually perfect composure over someone throwing a petty insult at him, but not caring in the slightest. Meanwhile, Dawn clearly didn't have the same control, having to be stopped from yelling at the boy by Cilan and Iris, who were- **_unfortunately-_ **more than used to Trip's antics by this point.

Walking away fuming, Trip still turned around to throw just one more insult. "Try not to lose until we reach the finals, if you will." He said with a condescending smirk, and this time Cynthia and Dawn just raised their eyebrows at him, not even wanting to comment that the chances of _that_ happening were close to none.

Ash just grabbed a plate with a pizza seemingly out of nowhere, Pikachu stabbing it with a fork with that dumb grin still in place, and now Cynthia didn't know if she should laugh or be scared, because _jeez that was kinda creepy._

His three younger friends just laughed while Trip stomped away. When he was out of sight, Ash immediately dropped the stupid demeanor, grumbling to himself about 'why the hell would he think I would use a fork to eat pizza anyway.'

Cynthia just looked questioningly towards his Unova companions, who were clearly the only ones there who were more used to... whatever _that_ was. They just shrugged. 

"Long story."

Dawn sighed, turning to Ash who was still pacing and complaining to Pikachu. "Ash, care to share with the class?" She asked tiredly, already having met more than enough annoying people today. Cynthia shared the sentiment.

Turning around, Ash just huffed, looking extremely frustrated but also like he couldn't give a damn anyway, which was... confusing to say the least. "That was me pissing off Trip, because apparently he thinks he's so much better than me because I'm from "the boonies" whatever the hell _that_ means, so in his head I'm apparently inferior to him or something, but honestly I think he sees _everyone_ as inferior to him, and so now I'm acting as he thinks I would act just to piss him off, which apparently includes, but it's not limited to: eating pizza with a fork-"

Scoffing good naturedly, Cynthia stated drily at her friend. "Ok, I think you're overreacting a b-" 

"-acting like an idiot at every possible opportunity-"

"Now that doesn't sound too far from the truth." Dawn teased with a laugh, but Ash didn't stop for even a second.

"-wasting all my money buying Nest Balls-"

"Ok, that's a weird one." Cynthia said, wondering what the hell people spread around in here.

"-watching porn for the plot, whatever that means-"

"W- W- WHAT?!" Cynthia couldn't help but shriek, her face burning while Alder laughed, and she turned a deadly glare at him the second he opened his mouth, eyes screaming _if you pollute his head I'll rip your intestines out._

For the second time today- _new record, yay-_ Alder did the smart thing and shut up, taking a step back for good measure.

"-and apparently, thinking GT IS BETTER THAN Z!"

It was like time froze on them, the Sinnoh Champion's hand instinctively flying to her chest as if she had just been punched, people around them seemingly backing away.

"Wh- whoa, I felt that. Right here." The blonde said with a strained voice, suddenly wanting to punch something, or someone.

Alder hid behind a tree just to guarantee.

"I think I'm gonna vomit..." Dawn said, looking and feeling sick along with Piplup, who groaned, face green. Cilan patted her back while Iris got a bucket for her. "Welcome to the club." They said with a sigh as the bluenette vomited on it, Piplup immediately following suit.

After making sure she wasn't going to vomit as soon as she spoke, Cynthia finally answered her friend. "Yup, I get your pain now, let's go kill him." She said only _half_ joking, getting Ash to laugh even though he sobered a few seconds later.

"Oh, I would love to, but unfortunately, that's "illegal". Can you believe that?! Jeez, it's like the universe is just trying to make my life harder." He grumbled irritably, using one hand to make air quotes over illegal while the other still held the pizza that he had gotten out of nowhere, Pikachu mimicking him and looking just as annoyed as his best friend.

"Can I have that piz-" Alder was interrupted when the plate hit his face along with the pizza, Ash and Cynthia not even turning around to look at him as they continued to talk, while Dawn, Cilan and Iris looked at him with the widest eyes imaginable, because even if Alder was the most chill guy ever, he was still the fricking CHAMPION of the region they were on.

"Thanks!" Was all he said as he got the plate out of his face, happily munching on the pizza. "I don't know what I was expecting honestly." Dawn sweatdropped, intending to follow Ash and Cynthia as they walked away when they were suddenly cornered by Georgia and Burgundy, both immediately yelling at Cilan and Iris about big hairs and presumptuous evaluations.

"This is gonna be our whole day isn't it?" She said with a sigh, Piplup asking if he could have that bucket back please.

"He's affecting you more than I would expect honestly. Did he beat you in a battle?" Cynthia asked as they walked away from prying eyes, part of her knowing that was _REALLY_ unlikely, but another part of her considering that maybe Trip was like Paul and had been through several regions before meeting Ash, which would at least explain his overconfidence in beating Alder. Kinda. Not really.

The Sinnoh Champion wondered just when she started caring so much about Ash that her opinions about him became _this_ biased.

She found out she didn't care in the slightest.

Groaning while Pikachu snorted and laughed, Ash took his hat off to run a hand through his hair. "No, I wiped the floor with him every time we fought, including the first one where Pikachu couldn't use his electric attacks because of fricking Zekrom deciding to show up for a visit." Pikachu looked _specially_ pissed off at that.

"Why am I even surprised?" Cynthia sighed, placing a hand on Ash's shoulder just to ground herself and try not to imagine a horrible scenario where things went terribly wrong. Ash grabbed her hand and squeezed it reassuringly along with Pikachu, causing her to relax immensely.

"Yeah well, he didn't do anything with Pikachu's power thankfully, so I guess you can imagine how that went." Deadpan hard as Pikachu snorted about the easiest battle of his life, Cynthia was thankful for the change of topic, laughing as he released her hand.

"Jeez, did anyone die?" She immediately realized she said the wrong thing when Ash and Pikachu both tensed, stopping their walk for a second before immediately continuing like nothing had happened. "Pftt, not yet at least." He said good naturedly, genuinely thinking he could pretend that didn't just happen.

_Yeah, as if._

Placing a hand on his shoulder and making sure they weren't around anyone who could hear them, Cynthia waited for Ash to stop walking before taking his hand, squeezing it reassuringly like he did for her a few seconds ago.

"Ash." Was all she said, but it was enough.

Rubbing at his eyes, Ash tried to evade. "I'm just being stup-"

 _"No._ Don't you dare saying that about yourself, nothing about what you're going through is stupid." Her tone was enough to silence him, and she immediately softened. "Hey, c'mon, what's going on? Did Trip say something that got you upset and you don't feel okay around him anymore?"

She didn't know if she would be able to avoid murder if that was the case.

"No, honestly, Trip's been the _least_ of my problems really. I'm just being a childish little brat and-" Hugging him to her side before he could finish, the blonde just waited for him to calm down, seemingly collecting himself before talking to her about what world ending threat got to him this time, and she was _so ready_ to take this shit to Arceus, because _Ash didn't deserve this you bast-_

"Not many big world ending threats popped around me this region."

That... was _not_ what she was expecting.

She _had_ noticed Ash seemed much more relaxed when they met at the ice cream vendor, but swore she had seen that tension that _always_ seemed to be around him in Sinnoh when she told him Meloetta was a Mythical and-

Oh.

**_Oh God no._ **

_She was fucking stupid._

But she didn't say anything yet, choosing to bang her head against a wall later until the wall shattered, the Sinnoh Champion waited for Ash to talk, because she knew very well that in moments like these he _really_ needed someone to just listen to him and be there.

Brock wasn't with him this time.

She couldn't even begin to imagine how hard that must be for him.

Finally, Ash broke the silence.

"There was... Kyurem, and Keldeo and the Swords of Justice." She had to reign in her excitement on that, knowing she could read it later under Gary Oak's paper and the ridiculous surname Ash used to submit everything he found to him, because _damnit this wasn't the time Cynthia!_

"That wasn't too bad, honestly, just the usual." She knew very well what _the usual_ meant by this point. Not world ending, but with a risk to several lives and sometimes maybe a city or more.

If there had been a region or world ending threat she would've known, because she _would've fucking been there._

"And then there was... Victini, I guess." Here, Ash shuddered, visibly holding back tears while grasping his hand with his other one to keep himself grounded, Pikachu nuzzling him and cooing and whispering things Cynthia didn't understand but was sure Ash did.

Now sure they were hidden from view, she sat with him by the tree they were under, leaning his face against her shoulder and running a hand through his hair, his hat discarded beside him while Pikachu was on his lap, and they both did their best to calm him down, while also holding back their own tears because _goddamnit this wasn't fair._

"Can I tell you something really horrible?" He whispered, seeming more relaxed but just _exhausted_ at the same time. And this is what Cynthia hated the most. When he just looked _tired._

She didn't know what would happen when he finally reached his limit, and tried not to shudder everytime she thought about it.

_Ash always seemed like he had no limit, but moments like these always served as a punch in the gut to remind her that **he's just a kid.**_

"Anything." She whispered back, trying not to feel scared when Pikachu visibly curled up on himself, looking so lost that she instinctively braced for the most horrible thing she could imagine-

"When I got launched into space with Pikachu and Victini, _I wanted to die."_

She could've **_never_** braced herself for that.

Freezing, she tried to process what he just told her- _please let it be a joke, **please Arceus let this just be a horrible joke I'm begging you-**_ while also trying to calm her breathing and her heartbeat and were those tears, that's not good right?

Ash didn't seem to notice her distress, but honestly at this point he may just be too exhausted to care. "When my body was freezing and I could barely hear or see anything, the only thing I could think about was how I had broken my promise to Victini. But I didn't even care about the fact that I was about to die. Honestly, I can admit part of me _wanted to._ Is- is that normal I- Cynthia?" 

Finally noticing that she was currently trying _very hard_ to not have a nervous breakdown, Cynthia grabbed Ash's wrists on pure instinct- _they were NOT mom instincts, **shut up grandma-**_ desperately blinking through her tears to see if she could find some horrible mark of the fact that he had reached his limit and _she hadn't even fucking noticed it._

"Cynthia, hey, calm down! I promise I didn't do anything like... _that."_ Wincing at the fact that he had thought about it sometimes, when the knives Cilan used were close and it was a particularly bad day, but choosing to ignore that for now to reassure his friend/mentor/mother figure/ _they really loved each other but they both kinda sucked at admitting it okay._

Cynthia just wiped her eyes and immediately pulled him into a hug, squeezing him hard into her chest and not wanting to release him anytime soon, something that Ash clearly shared as he hugged her back just as tightly after the initial instinctive tension had vanished.

"I'm sorry." Was obviously the first thing that came to his mind, and Cynthia- _very reluctantly-_ pulled back to look into his eyes, and he was thrown back by the sheer intensity that both her eyes were showing, the lock of hair that usually covered one of her eyes pulled back behind her ear for now.

 _"Don't."_ She took a deep breath to compose herself, and Ash only felt more guilty at knowing she was probably not gonna be on top shape for the battle, but hey, what else is new?

Him screwing his friends over was the only thing he seemed to be good at these days.

Grabbing his face with both her hands, Cynthia forced him to look at her, hands so _soft_ but eyes so _strong,_ and he never felt more thankful to her than now. 

_"Don't."_ She said again, with seemingly more despair, and _ouch,_ he really couldn't hide anything from her. "I will be perfectly ok for the match, you know that I'm really good at focusing on only that when I have to." And he _did_ know, had saw and had it explained to him how she was so terrifyingly good at separating her battle self from her casual self, knowing that it was one of the many reasons she was the Champion for so long.

"I'm the one who should be apologiz- ah ah ah ah! _I'm talking now."_ Knowing better than to try and talk anyway, Ash just resigned himself to stir in guilt in silence. "I should've realized you were this bad before, and I didn't, and I _know_ it's not my responsibility but I don't give a shit because I _want_ you to be my responsibility, do you understand? You're not- you never have- forced me into doing something I didn't want, and I know you won't believe me right now but know that _I do."_

Shocked into silence by her words and the fact that she had just cursed- _something he had only seen her do once, to her horror, and Arceus, that had been an awesome day, why couldn't he have more of that-_ he just stared at her, eyes wider and so big and so full of light and hurt and happiness and loss and-

He didn't deserve this.

Lowering his head, aware that Cynthia's hands were still cupping his face, he could only wipe at his eyes while doing his best to not look at her. _"You shouldn't."_

"Ash-"

"No! God, I don't deserve this, any of this!" Standing up abruptly and startling both himself and Cynthia, Pikachu following him helplessly but still maintaining his distance, and thank God they were hidden from view or this would probably be the most awkward day of his life.

"I thought things would be more normal here you know?! There were barely any world ending threats around here, and I felt like Arceus was finally giving me a break for once, and then I felt like maybe thing would get better but _nope!_ It's clear that he just saved all the world ending bullshit for now, and just have me fix it like _always_ and- why Cynthia? Just answer me that, why would you want _any_ part on this?" 

Stunned into silence by his rant and by the fact that he had just _cursed-_ ** _she was going to find and murder whoever taught him that word-_** she didn't even register his question until he collapsed again, seemingly spent.

_"God, I'm so **tired."**_

Ah.

There it was again. 

_She didn't know that she would ever come to loathe the God of all Pokémon so much._

Standing up and sitting in front of him in a matter of seconds, keeping her movements slow and deliberate as to not startle him, she waited for him to calm down a little before finally speaking.

He asked why she would want any part on this.

She was almost surprised by how much she wanted to scream _why wouldn't I?!_

"I know you're not gonna believe this, and you don't _have_ to right now. But I love you Ash." He seemingly balked at those words, eyes full of disbelief and she wasn't going to try and change his mind now. She was just going to say what she felt and hope it was enough.

Ash could be really stubborn after all.

 _"I love you._ I don't even know when I started caring so much about you but I don't even care I- you're amazing, and you're kind, and you're selfless and you're _so good_ and you save and help and inspire _so many people_ and you make mistakes and you pick yourself up with a smile anyway and _you never give up._ But I think me and everyone just expected you to be and do all of that by yourself and _I'm so sorry."_

Leaning her forehead against his, she felt so much regret at not having helped him more before something as drastic as this happened- _he wanted to **die,** and she couldn't blame him one bit-_ and ignoring his expression of pure shock at the fact she had said she _loved him._

"But know that even when you want to give up, even when you feel like everything is hopeless and you don't believe in yourself anymore, even when you want to **_die_ **and just see the end, never forget that me, that your mom, that Gary and Professor Oak and Dawn and Brock and Iris and Cilan and Pikachu and all your Pokémon and _so many people you helped, we're not giving up on you, we believe in you, you give us hope and we don't want you to die."_

She had to hold back a few more tears as she finished, hating the simple fact that she had assure him of all that but not even thinking twice about doing so, because all of it was true.

**_The world literally wouldn't be here without him._ **

**_And so she would make sure the world wouldn't cause his end._ **

Still frozen in stunned silence, she wasn't surprised that it was Pikachu that got him out of it with a little zap, making the fourteen years old jerk and look around wildly before his eyes settled on her, and _Jesus,_ this must've been weird for Arceus to watch, both of them little more than crying messes right now but not caring in the slightest.

And then Ash _laughed._

_A real laugh._

It was so soft and small that she almost didn't hear it, but _she did,_ and it was the most _beautiful_ thing ever.

Reaching for both her hands, she grasped them immediately, grinning at him as he grinned at her, and she really didn't expect this to happen but she's _so thankful it did._

She wouldn't trade this- _trade him-_ for anything in the universe.

"I- I love you too." It was shy and hesitant and he seemed like he was bracing for disaster, but no less powerful in anyway, and she couldn't help but let some more tears fall.

Such an obvious confession shouldn't turn her heart to jelly, that wasn't normal right?

 _"I know."_ She said with a mischievous grin, unable to hide her excited laugh when he laughed as well.

"You didn't just Han Solo me!"

Getting up and grabbing his hat from Pikachu, she placed it on top of his messy raven hair and kissed his forehead, grinning.

"I guess I just did."

**Author's Note:**

> So I bet you're wondering, what the fuck did I just read, and why? Well, simply put, this was inspired by the Keef Crew's video about people who only watch dubbed anime- go watch it, it's great- SAO Abridged, and the weird fever dreams I have when I'm awake and bored! And then it just turned into an angsty mess because I was feeling like making that and I also filled this with fluff because I know several people here are needing some of that, and as you saw we also had some probably incredibly inaccurate talk about depression but basically the message is: you're not alone, don't give up, please. So you know, the usual. Also, I gifted this fic to basically everyone who inspired the dialogue or the ideas here, so go check their fics out to. Comment please. See ya!


End file.
